Current turnaround time is: < 10 Days
The Fast and The Fumerous: Car Melts Introductory Sale
$26.00

The Fast and The Fumerous: Car Melts Introductory Sale

5 brand new wax melts and a special car jar for Summer.

Is the inside of your car boiling hot death reminding you of the specter of climate change because it's only Spring?

Every Summer, our piece of crap sun ruins dozens of my wax products by melting them, so this year I leaned into it and developed 5 new scents specifically meant to melt in your hot ass car.

The concept is simple: You store the wax in your car. It melts. It smells good. The end.

I've taken the pains to find the smartest design of containers I could for this purpose. Fitting in large* cupholders, these car jars will safely** hold at least 3 tarts of wax that will melt at the slightest provocation of heat. The shape of the jars makes them resistant to sloshing, and the holes allow the scent to permeate your car while providing another layer of spillage protection.

*anything is possible. You're still driving with hot wax in your car, so be as safe as you can, don't mess with it while you're driving, don't fiddle with the top, don't look at it, and definitely don't pick it up with your bare hands because it's a hot-as-fuck glass and wax grenade that you are definitely going to fumble into your face and kill everyone. So don't do that.

**test fit your cupholder before driving. If it doesn't fit, I recommend making one that will. The included jar can still be microwaved with the lid off and used as an easy indoor warmer.

Here's what you get with this sale:

* A clamshell of all 5 wax scents for $25.

* For $1 more you can get a car jar added in. The caps come in 1 of 4 random colors.

Pussywagon - Juicy passionfruit, mandarin leaf, Bulgarian rose, and a hint of musk. A real panty dropper.

Dragula - Hand-blended dragonsblood. Dig through the ditches. Burn through the witches.

Deathproof - Musk, cassis, vanilla, sandalwood, pomegranate, glossy black varnish. I'm afraid you're gonna have to start getting scared... immediately.

Fury Road - Vetiver, labdanum, sandalwood, tonka, orange blossom as bright as the burning sun. You live. You die. You live again.

Fake Taxi - Eucalyptus, olibanum, cedar, oak moss and a hint of musk. If you don't have any money, I'm sure we can work something out.

Shipping on this sale begins 6/1/18